How to keep an open mind about your child’s career aspirations

From an early age, children like to identify with jobs or professions that appeal to them or that they know. They can easily imagine themselves as police officers, firefighters, or nurses, or even as astronauts exploring the universe and flying to the stars. Sometimes, they also pretend to be their favourite celebrities or media personalities.

Parents generally find it sweet and endearing when their little ones tell them what they want to be when they grow up. But that all changes once their children are older and their plans for the future become more concrete, usually around adolescence.

The “career choice” stage can be a particularly emotional time for parents. They often experience a range of feelings, from surprise to concern to just plain confusion! From their perspective, there are a lot of things to worry about: financial insecurity, unstable working conditions, distance from home, unconventional career paths, etc.

These fears are normal and most often come from a place of love. Parents simply want what is best for their children; above all, they want to protect them from “bad” decisions, hardship, and unnecessary suffering.

There are a few things you can do as a parent to support your child’s career aspirations and ensure that the planning process is beneficial to both sides.

Acknowledge and listen. Acknowledging your fears and anxiety will help you understand the source of your worries and articulate your feelings more clearly. Admitting that you have mixed feelings about your child’s decision is the first step to having a more open conversation. This will allow you to talk to them about their decision and try to understand why they made it without being judgmental.

Try to relax and keep an open mind. Repeat after me: There is no such thing as the perfect choice! No matter what your child decides, it is their life, and no one else’s. This experience will help them get to know themself better and learn how to make decisions independently. It is important to tolerate a certain degree of uncertainty and, above all, to keep in mind that no choice is permanent and that there are many paths to success in both the academic and working worlds.

Talk about plans rather than a plan. It can be very stressful for young people to feel like they have to pick one thing that they will do for the rest of their life. Luckily, that is no longer the reality today. There is a growing array of education and career options to choose from, and students can opt for a variety of specializations and training courses. Exploring different possibilities is a normal and healthy part of a person’s career development.

Encourage exploration. Taking the time to sit down with your child as they research their options can be enlightening and reassuring, as you have the opportunity to discover what interests your child, understand their perspective, explore unfamiliar fields, learn more about the programs and institution they have chosen, and perhaps even overcome prejudices about specific fields of study.

Ask for support. It is normal not to have all the answers, and parents are not expected to be experts in academics or guidance counselling. Fortunately, there are places you can turn to for help! Guidance counsellors are valuable resources who can advise students and parents every step of the way. Encourage your child to reach out to their guidance counsellor when they need assistance. These professionals can also support parents while maintaining the confidentiality of their conversations with students over the age of 14.